Do you have a friend, co-worker, or family member that is in an abusive relationship?

Many people ask, “So why doesn’t she or he just leave”?

The question isn’t why doesn’t the victim leave; the question is, “Why does the partner abuse her”?

Some Reasons Victims Might Stay

• See no way out
• Being threatened
• To protect the children
• Religious, cultural or family beliefs would condemn him or her for not being a good spouse
• Abuser is a community leader or authority figure
• Nobody would believe him or her
• Low self-esteem
• Chances of injury or death due to domestic violence increase by 75% after a victim leaves
• Financial considerations
• Isolation from friends and family

What can you do?

• Become educated about domestic violence
• Recognize the signs
• Reach out to anyone you feel may be a victim, show your support and concern
• Listen and believe when someone talks about domestic violence
• Provide a list of community resources to individuals seeking help
• Encourage victims to use the resources to help themselves and their children
• Make others aware of the magnitude of domestic violence

What can you say?

• “I am concerned for you and your children.”
• “You didn’t/don’t cause the violence.”
• “You don’t deserve to be abused.”
• “Abuse is not love.”
• “You are not alone.”
• “There are people you can talk to who know about domestic violence.”
• “I am sorry this is happening to you.”
• “You are brave to reach out for help.”
• “I am proud of you for protecting yourself and your children.”
• “Be proud of yourself.”